Monday, August 10, 2015


I have been working with Penguin / Random House over the past year on my book
It is about my life from the age of eighteen . Having had a contract for an 80,000 word book and actually having 500,000 words , there is a lot left out !
There are so many things I couldn't put in also , for different reasons.
My main purpose of this book is to highlight the flaws within the system.
Where cut backs cause lives.
Where mistakes cause lives.
 To also show what needs to be done now.
There also needs to be an understanding of this 'disease' called Domestic Violence.
It's widths, depths and breadths that cause untold damage globally.
How it spider webs itself out from the perpetrator through generations now and into the future.
The ripples are deadly poison to the minds of those affected in person and those who see and hear and lay witness to such horrors.
There needs to be an overhaul in the system.
One that dictates to the world that we will NOT accept violence.
A change that represents and respects the deaths of those before us and gives their lives meaning, worthy of their individual existence.
Change that would deter this crime , this misunderstood human crime.
I would like to see perpetrators sentenced with a fitting time served , with no early release.
Let there be a set maximum amount of years for rape, attempted murder, murder, false imprisonment, grevious bodily harm with intent.
These crimes need to hold high sentencing , we need to publicise that continuously to deter crime.
Deterrence is the key, is it not ?

What is a life worth ?

You may well ask, especially if you have lost a loved one to this 'disease'.
I call Domestic Violence a 'disease' because it is growing in numbers globally and there appears to be no cure.

How is the worth of a life even worked out by the justice system ?

How these crimes affect the victims.
It leaves them with a life sentence of physical and mental torture.
For some though, they didn't even get that choice having had their lives,
 their breath stolen by another human beings choice of act.

How do we stop them before they start ?
Educate, raise awareness , set high sentencing , imprison for repentance not for a pleasurable holiday with all mod cons included. The world is guilty of enticing and encouraging crime .The music industry, unsuitable lyrics , raunchy videos, destructive games of death and violence,  I could go on. Prison to some has become a place of bragging and gaining knowledge to further crime. Having so many benefits on the  inside,  when good citizens on the outside struggle with the bare minimum to survive.
What message does this feed to the future generations minds ?
They are brainwashed from an early age by television and the media. If we are not the idols they need to look up to ......How can we expect to change anything ?

We are making headway very slowly with small changes,  but as each day passes another life is marred, scarred or taken .

For some, tomorrow is too late .
For some, tomorrows are not promised.
Let sentence reflect repentence
Let sentence make sense
Let life have some worth.

I have a gripe with the system in particularly where human rights come to be weighed in favour of a perpetrator. How on earth this is ever fair or just is beyond words. I use a phrase that to some would say does not exist , but it's embedded in my brain .It's my way of labelling, to explain a whole sentence in two words.

' Humanic Crime ' 

This is where one human being inflicts pain, injuries, torture to the mind, body and soul of another human being (beings) .

This type of criminal should lose their human rights !

Which would stop them using the system to get what they want by playing the  'human rights card' .

I understand as I have been told on numerous occasions that what I want is not possible.

So I beg a question....why not ?

If we are to stop these people in their tracks 'before' they commit these crimes then we are going to need a strong enforcing deterrent.

If you have the chance to read my book you will get why I feel so strongly about change.
Together globally , with a united strong voice, we can change history.


Tuesday, June 17, 2014



Raising awareness, sharing stories, making changes .
It's time for the government to sit up and listen.


It was an honour to be invited to speak .So many brave ladies speaking out . Getting the message across to the world that we want domestic violence to stop. If we all join together , stand together and voice together , Change will come !
Thank you for my award and beautiful flowers xx

Saturday, April 26, 2014


What an amazing day !
Most inspiring .

I was invited by MARIE HANSON (CEO of S.T.O.R.M. ) to be a main speaker at this event alongside

Cllr Nicola Nardelli
Tina Renton
Sarbjit Kaur Athwal
Sherica Spence

Huge thank you to Claire Jackson for organizing my transport, without that I would  not have been able to attend.

Marie Hanson has made a huge impact with S.T.O.R.M. check out the achievements here:-

They are also in need of donations and volunteers

I was presented with this ''WOMEN OF POWER AWARD 2014  ''

This was a huge hug of gratitude and recognition for what I do silently.
You see,  to me, saving lives is imperative and whilst I am still here I shall continue to do just that.

The government are not helping our cause by making huge cutbacks in the places where money is most needed.

I am constantly raising awareness everywhere I go.
Jahmene Douglas is my eldest son 'Youth Ambassador for Womens Aid '
 He will be going round the schools this year with a package to help children get through their emotions of living with domestic violence. It will explain where to go for help and outline the rights and wrongs of relationships. What is acceptable and what is not acceptable.
The government pulled the funding on this project  So we stepped in to get it done !!
Jahmene will obviously be doing it for free.

I am still raising money for womens aid as they are actually not funded by the government , unlike other large charities. So everything they do is through donations. It is becoming a struggle to keep refuges open ...which is life saving !
Also small local groups of aid, guidance and support have closed !!
I have raised my set target on this site below and was informed that the electricity bill for their office needed paying and this covered that just in time.

The money donated through my site goes directly to  womens aid.
Daily, money is needed for a whole range of things.You can go on the main site to keep updated

womens aid main site

Tuesday, April 22, 2014


''I AM A FIGHTER '' Painting by Mandy Thomas
up for auction bids have begun at £200
50% will go to Womens Aid
This is valued between £800 and £1000
If you wish to place a bid please contact Mandy at :- ARTISTMANDY@OUTLOOK.COM


Government cut backs are affecting all the services involved with Domestic Violence.
It is the difference between life and death...choices taken from women 'on the run' when there's nowhere to run to !!

40th anniversary Womens Aid

Women's Aid National Conference: Ready for the Future

Annual Conference 2014
Wednesday 2 and Thursday 3 July 2014
Aston University, Birmingham
Confirmed speakers include Norman Baker MP, Minister for Crime Prevention and Polly Neate, Chief Executive of Women’s Aid. Keep an eye on and follow @womensaid on Twitter for speaker announcements.
The 40th anniversary of Women’s Aid is an opportunity to celebrate a movement which has saved countless lives and set the standard for domestic violence services across the world. It is also time – with a general election approaching – to develop a shared vision of the domestic violence services of the future, as well as identifying and addressing the key challenges we face in the present. 
• Day One is for everyone who tackles or prevents domestic violence in their work. Set firmly in a multi-agency context, it will provide analysis and ideas on key policy issues and challenges affecting all agencies.
• Day Two provides a space for Women’s Aid members only to focus on the practical steps needed to survive and thrive into the future, sharing best practice and building on success.
More details to follow soon.
To register your interest in this event please email 
Wed, 2nd Jul 2014, 09.00 - Thu, 3rd Jul 2014, 17.00 

Hosted by: Women's Aid 
Venue: Aston University, Birmingham 
Contact: Katie Ross

Monday, April 29, 2013


bbc radio 5 live interview on d.v.myself Jahmene Victoria Derbyshire

one response from this

i eventually got the strength to click on the link & listen to your interview. tears are streaming down my face. God bless you all - you have been through worst degree torment/abuse. i can't even begin to imagine what life was like for you all. i know what it's like to be alone, to be sexually abused, to witness domestic violence, to live every second of your life in fear, to cry yourself to sleep, to be controlled by a monster etc ...
you are all so inspirational now fighting for justice and speaking out about the life you had for so long even though the scars are still there (many unseen). the memories, fear, flashbacks never leave and yes you do wonder why you were put on this earth? what was/is my purpose for being here? what did i ever do to deserve it? i never asked for it to happen nor did i want to witness/experience it - questions we all ask ourselves over and over again.
eventually, if you're one of the lucky ones, you manage to get away from it. you speak out about it to get help & to stop it from happening to others (family members) but the justice system brings you down like a ton of bricks - worse than you ever thought possible. trailed through court cases to relive it all over again; having "it" sitting there staring at you, listening to your every word; swearing under oath and lying through it all. previous convictions hidden from the jury - just so they don't make judgement!!!? one word against the other; no evidence - it was too long ago; sick to the stomach - two trials later he walked away free TO DO IT ALL AGAIN! been in jail for it before but NO that wasn't allowed to come out in court nor was i allowed to let it slip out - now wishing i had of along with so much else. looking back in anger still filled with fury. don't ask me why? but i can't let it go.
threatened every day that if i told anyone he would deny it all & no-one would believe me. "sure you can't go to your mum or dad" he always said! they had a violent relationship and he knew i was too frightened to talk to them so it was easy for him to groom me then move in on me and, of course, i was an extremely quiet shy child.
somehow through the domestic violence, sexual abuse and loneliness i am still here today. i often ask myself why? what has my journey been for? all i want is love for all, world peace, violence & abuse of all sorts to stop and an end to poverty - people dying of starvation every day. it breaks my heart to see it still happen. it seems that this is far too much to wish for?
well, do you keep everything to yourself? do you take the law into your own hands or do you let the law(s) decide? something i still couldn't answer to this day because the law is a law onto itself! IF they do get sentenced sure they haven't a thing to worry about. good behaviour and they're out in no time - to repeat, repeat, repeat ... tougher sentencing is needed and now!
i am a very private person, still a little shy but i hope that sharing this will help someone - even if it's only one person then i will have achieved something.
one thing i will NEVER regret is bringing it out in the open because I WAS BELIEVED STRAIGHT AWAY. i worried many many years in fear of not being believed - please don't be like me.
you can very easily nowadays find helpline numbers on the internet - DON'T BE AFRAID TO PICK UP THE PHONE & GET HELP. you are beautiful and worthy of life.
i am signing Anonymous but hope i have helped someone and if i haven't then i know for sure that Mandy and Jahmene definitely have and will continue to. they have been so inspirational and amazing on their journey/search for freedom and a new life.
thank you to Mandy for tweeting the link to her website and to her wonderful son Jahmene for letting us have the joy to listening to his voice in many ways and on a happy note - he blows the roof off every building he sings in :) he is world class - in my eyes.
i hope i havent offended or discouraged anyone with this. i'm not great at writing stuff x

Tuesday, April 23, 2013



Opemipo Jaji, 18, facing a life sentence after being found guilty of repeatedly raping the girl for three hours

Opemipo Jaji
Opemipo Jaji, who has been convicted of raping an 11-year-old girl. Photograph: Metropolitan police/PA
An inquiry has been launched after a teenage paedophile was convicted of dragging an 11-year-old girl into a park and repeatedly raping her for three hours while on probation.
Opemipo Jaji, an 18-year-old trainee chef, committed the rape after he had just left his probation officer when he spotted the girl going home from school on a bus last November.
After following her and forcing her into Jubilee Park in Enfield, north London, he attacked the girl, threatening to stab her if she resisted and telling her he would film her and send copies to children at her school and to "everyone you love".
After the rape, he went to a youth centre from which he had been banned as part of a supervision order.
In February 2011, Jaji sexually assaulted and robbed a 12-year-old schoolgirl on a housing estate. He was given a 10-month detention and training order in September 2011, serving five months in custody.
In April last year, he was fined £15 for failing to comply with the order, while a month later he was given a youth supervision order for 18 months for making indecent pictures of young girls.
A Probation Service spokesman said: "Our deepest sympathies are with the victim and their family following this horrific crime. A multi-agency public protection arrangement (Mappa) serious case review into what happened in this case has been launched."
Jaji, who was found guilty at the Old Bailey of rape , is facing a life term when sentenced on 7 June.
He had denied raping the girl, who gave evidence against him in court by videolink, claiming that he had been at a youth club working on a backing track for a song when the attack took place.
"I wrote the song after I heard a girl killed herself from bullying," he told the jury. "I wrote the song hoping things would get better." He said he had been on a bus with the schoolgirl and had picked up her travel pass when it fell to the floor.
Jaji said he went to Jubilee Park later that evening to compose music but left after 10 minutes because he saw police at the gate. Recalling the attack, his victim told jurors he had said he was "this close" to killing her.
She said: "He kept saying, 'Stop moving or I will stab you'. I tried to run away but then he grabbed me when I got to the pavement of the park entrance.
"I kept on saying 'stop' because it was hurting me and he kept saying 'shut up' to me. He was just saying it every time I spoke. When I was on the floor, he said he would film me and send it into my school. I was saying 'get off me, get off me, stop'."
The girl, who had one of her gloves stuffed in her mouth, ran home after she was allowed to dress.
Her parents were distraught when she turned up dirty and dishevelled, the court heard.
They had called police when she failed to arrive home from school by 5.30pm.The child was taken to hospital and underwent an operation.
Rosina Cottage QC, prosecuting, said: "Jaji is interested in little girls and sexual acts with little girls."
He was arrested a few days later after CCTV was examined and his bedroom was searched. A book was found about a little girl being sexually assaulted, along with advertisements for child-care vacancies and a picture of a young girl in Australia.
There was also an article about missing April Jones, the five-year-old Welsh girl thought to have been murdered.
Police believe he was a dangerous paedophile whose offending was escalating.
Detective Chief Inspector Adam Lowe of the Met's Sapphire command, said: "Jaji posed a great danger to young girls and despite the great weight of evidence against him, refused to accept his guilt and forced the victim to give evidence in court. This was a particularly brutal but unusual attack on an innocent 11-year-old schoolgirl who will no doubt continue to suffer the emotional scars of what happened to her for a very long time.
"I would like to take this opportunity to praise the bravery of the victim and her family."
Sarah Maclaren of the Crown Prosecution Service said: "This was a vicious and horrific attack on a young victim.
"As a result of this conviction a dangerous sexual offender has now been brought to justice.
"I would like to thank the 11-year-old victim and her family for their enormous strength and courage in supporting this prosecution."